A month ago I had went to church to listen to another enticing sermon from my pastor.As I put my phone down to listen to my Pastor preach, he said a dialogue of how “Hurt People…Hurt People”. At first, I thought to myself that this is poor grammar but reiterated his words in my mind and whallaaaaa….. It clicked. Indeed, people that are hurt by someone will undeniably continue the cycle of hurt thus hurting another either through revenge, settling scores, vocal insults, etc… I then started to think of all the times I had been butt hurt about something someone had done or said to me and how it may have been so hurtful that I wanted to do the same to them. As horrible as it had sound, the sermon was spot on that indeed those that are hurt will subconsciously perpetuate the cycle of pain and hurt on others.I was guilty of it myself. I thought to myself that if I can stop myself in the heat of the moment ,I can change the course of perpetuating pain. In actuality, the fact that I wanted to hurt someone only meant that I had not been healed by being hurt. If every time we all became hurt by someone, imagine we stop and analyze the situation as to why we are hurt and how we can heal ourselves. This self analysis would make such a great difference in not passing on another pain unto someone else.
Here are some of the Reasons why hurt People …hurt People
1. Hurt people often transfer their inner anger onto their family and close friends
2.Hurt people interpret every word spoken to them through the prism of their pain
3. Hurt people interpret every action through the prism of their pain
4. Hurt people often portray themselves as victims and carry a “victim spirit”
5.Hurt people often alienate others and wonder why no one is there for them
6.Hurt people are often frustrated and depressed because past pain continually spills over into their present consciousness
7.Hurt people often erupt with inappropriate emotion because particular words, actions, or circumstances “touch” and “trigger” past woundedness
9. Hurt people often attempt to medicate themselves with excessive entertainment, drugs, alcohol, pornography, sexual relationships, or hobbies as a way to forget their pain and run from reality
10. Hurt people have learned to accommodate their private “false self” or “dark side” which causes them to be duplicitous and lack integrity
11. Hurt people are often self-absorbed with their own pain and are unaware that they are hurting other people
In Reality, hurt people need to forgive to be free. The Bible says in Ephesians 4:31-32 – Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
As you are reading this, I hope you can think about anyone that has recently hurt you either now or in the past to strongly but surely forgive them. I know exactly how hard this is, but we forgive to be free. We also forgive to not perpetuate an ongoing cycle of passing our pain onto the next person.
“Why Hurt People Hurt People.” Osephmattera.org, 10 Feb. 2015, josephmattera.org/why-hurt-people-hurt-people/.